2004-11-19 - 10:07 a.m.

dood! super dood. so i'm sleeping this morning, in mid dream, probably about green fields and running from the man, when the phone rings.

(last night i got the one i'm sleeping with, who *just happens* to be 25, to go to the einstein show and geek out with me.) we were late, so we had to speed read and we barely got to play.

i can't believe smarty didn't call, his so persistent and good about calling. i think he must of forgotten. he may be stopping by the store opening tonight. ya know, i see where he's at, i guess i just let myself develop brand spankin new illusions that we could have this wildly conversational friendship and i hold onto some threads between us. which is the same thing i've always done, so i want to challenge myself to get far past that.

i really like this consistent sex i'm having. we do need to use protection. unbelieveable that we don't. it's one of the most suicidal things you can subtly do with your body today.

i found out this guy is a complete stoner and that virtually every time we've been together he's been, to some degree, high. hillarious. by the way he told me a story about our illigitimate president, a friend of his had a picture of herself and ill prez and she had said that she had just given him a bunch of coke. it explains a lot. not as if i didn't already know that, now it's just confirmed.

ff....this morning, dead asleep with friend in bed. phone rings, i assume it's my wireless collections department calling as they have every morning at 8ish a.m.

no it's the buyer from the top nyc spot. i run butt naked pick up the phone and faux wakefulness. she wants my prices sent. that is pretty positive, if she wants my prices then she's not consternating so much over the product, but she's possibly interested in pulling the trigger. the trigga' bitch. i was so excited as i ran around my apartment butt naked & stepped in fresh cat throw up.

now i have my work cut out for me this weekend. it's endless. and i jump through so many of these hoops. some of which i see profit from and some of which feel like its hours and hours and hours of work seeming like dead wood floating by in the current of a lingering, teasing river.

shit i'm tired. i was too excited to hit the sack back.

anyway tonight at the boutique party, we potentially have scheduled: m in attendance, smarty, the new guy i'm shloffing and a few other friends. and i have nothing to wear. i have a feeling that it'll be appologetically mellow. now i'm having social anxiety over it. but i made a new custom piece for me to wear that is either, a. an insane late night idea that'll look as such.
b. fucking dope.

:*)