2003-12-17 - 7:07 p.m.

i realize that i've been unprofound lately. and very specific to life's little everyday's and unless your a consistent reader that must be very borring.

but it's where i'm at.

i need more play friends. i've got tix to a show and my friend wants to bag out and i can't find someone else. i want everyone to be on my schedule. of course i'm, asking terribly last minute, but fuck people can be so stale. i need a pg on this coast to motivate and go go go.

m and 40 both haven't called, joke on me. and tigger is playing awfully hard to catch. i guess it was me telling him that my mom has grounded me from dating. and then when asked why i spewed a plethora of bitter ass bullshit. it was in the midst of the nyc drama. so i can see his hesitation or relaxed attitude.

nothing much else to report. i liked snuggling with m last night. i'm taking lizard, step bro and company out tomorrow night. hopefully that'll be fun. of course it won't be now that i'm relying on it to be. it's only the surprise nights that turn out to be really fun. fuck i'm feeling empty without nyc's validation. i'll admit it, i'm one big vacuum!

fuck.