2003-04-10 - 12:41 a.m.

i can't seem to entice any good habits when it comes to food. i consistently find myself justifying why this food is okay to eat even tho it is well past it's best by date. egg's. milk and recently flank steak.

so the steak didn't go so well.

but my stomach is like a murderous chamber, charing anything i throw back.

i'm in a fix. two guys accidentally think that i'm only dating them. i committed to the surfer and never told the other to bugger off.

now i don't know what to do. i've been stalling so far.

cuz i want the surfer. i want to get to know the other AND i want to be single to meet new people.

i am a living clusterfuck.

my work partner and i are submitting our project this week and next and i'm a raw nerve regarding the results. it's my first attempt. it's crazy making. i j;ust want to be ridiculously wealthy by it, is that so fuckin much to ask?

if you haven't seen any jelly fish in a while, i strongly suggest you do.

hoorah, saddam down, now only thousands of brand new evil doers to go!! what is it, title two? is it getting snuck under our noses?

dude, i just need to sleep. i have to admit, this morning i was humilliated in the water. i've been on a winter surf hiatus. and now i completely bag. i'm shit. i'm cowardly. but the birds flying by were awfully purdy. pelican's by the dozen in perfect lines, gliding the curve of an almost wave.

i hope you all are well and notice some piece of humanity that makes it all worth it for you today. Otherwise, what is the fucking point?