2003-03-27 - 4:22 p.m.

"Naturally, the common people don't want war, but after all, it is the leaders of a country who determine the policy, and it is always a simple matter

to drag people along whether it is a democracy, or a fascist dictatorship, or a parliament, or a communist

dictatorship. Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. This is easy. All you have to do is to tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It

works the same in every country."

Hermann Goering, Hitler's Reich-Marshall, at the

Nuremberg Trials after WWII.

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i enjoyed a brief spurt of impassioned energy born of the unity in san fransisco. now back in extrodinarily apathetic LA, i've slid into the warmpth of the weather and the ease of do-nothingness and call your self an actor or writer.

auditions. sure i've been having them.

i had a great lunch with an old work geek friend at a japanese market and i bought trinkets with neet labels.

i've been back with the surfer because it was oscar night and i got lonely when i was driving home from my party.

so i'm no where fast.

hey check out votetoimpeach.org. i want that phony, bitch impeached.

i need to book some more work. i feel lazy right now. but i roll in cycles. fast and furious and then quiet and suddle. so i'm sure i'll pump out work soon.

i'm trying to do morning visualizations for what i want in my life. these have actually worked before. things that i focuz on really have come true. both the shit and the delicious.

i've been getting very politically active, calling the media, emailing every day. i can't just do nothing about that. i can't sit by. it helps me to know that i'm doing almost everything i can to do SOMETHING.

i need some time to myself. i feel smoothered by the surfer. he always wants to see me, i always feel that i owe him something. i dreampt of being trapped in a house by a man. everywhere i went, i couldn't get out. i love being with someone. but his whole energy demands so much of me. and i feel so much guilt in getting out, because i've strung him into me. i've pulled him here.