2001-08-14 - 9:55 p.m.

bali

i'm trying for clarity. i'm always obsessed with perfect decisions. i'm always complicating things so that i don't have to actually enjoy them.

i hate

hate

the waves here. i'd much rather surf LA

it is funny i came here for surf (no good)

and serenity (best nightlife ever).

the surfs incredible, if your rockin. i'm still new, so the stuff i can play on is horrid. all i get is pieces of the soup.

what should i do? shell out more dough for melbourne and sydney only for a few days there in their cold of winter-

or should i chill more time in the islands? i want to know what the city is like. but i'm afraid it's too cold and that i won't ever be able to move there anyway and that the travel time will wear on me.

i'm so sick of decisions. cush keeps talking i'm the one crap and we don't know eachother at all. and i don't know me or what the fuck i want. even with the next few weeks.

i have an insane story to tell you, rather a list called, 'what the fuck was i thinking list' soon to come.