2005-11-22 - 11:20 p.m.

i am happy with this new "diet." lizard was shocked. i've never been on one of these of any sort. one time i did a silencing and one day fast, hardly a diet. but this is fantastic!!!

all i do on atkins is eat the worst crap in life and expect to loose. a true american diet. brie and eggs for brekky, broccoli with a superb french butter, heavy cream, lemon and cheese sauce. cheeseburger, no bread -- who needs it anyway. i mean really, let's get to the point. the beef. the cheese. and for dessert, know you'll really no i'm a nutter, i whip up the heavy cream into a furry with splenda brown "sugar" and vanilla and it's sinful.

so my computer guys tires got slashed in my parking lot by someone in the building. and ask me how tempted i am to deal with this in a gansta flare up? while discussing the situation with my neighbor at his place (he saw parts of it and went trying to find the guy) i saw his piece...just totally out like a glass of water. man o man. that's neighbor number two within feet of me who has a gun.

and this is in my vegan peacelovin little hood. he has it cuz he used to be in "security" and he's always extremely vague when i push into those conversations. security for celebs? cia? cartel?

thank allah i like this neighbor immensly and he likes me. we look out for eachother. and he told me if i thought anyone was in my pad i could call him on his cell and he'd bust. oo my. if i die, you will know why. becuz guns are allowed on our streets.

i've been obsessed peeing on these little strips that tell me if my "diet" is going well. today it went progresssively better. i get so excited as i watch the color change on the pee dappled strip. like a preg test. yes yes! i'm burning carbs. by eating cheese! go figure.

what else.
well. a funny thing happens to me every holiday. i want to know if it happens to anyone else...
as the season ramps up and i need to harvest my money, rein it in to then give it out, i end up spending more on myself in these few weeks then the whole year. i get bit by consumerism. thinking of everything i want, then giving up on thinking that anyone will get it right and end up getting it for myself first with the motto in mind of, "taking care of myself."

so i bought myself a very expensive home phone. looking into a blackberry. bought a session with a pyschic. which is so entirely out of my character. i growl when someone asks me what my sign is. my sign is synic, thank you. but all the sudden i want some stranger to tell me lies about my life so i can have a better gripe.

i also want to buy deco work chairs so my peeps don't have to sit on my torn up fold ups i bought eight years ago. i want. i want. i want dr. hauska rotten apricot scrub. i want a lifetime supply of borba waters. i want books. i want a digital camera. and !! i want a chandelier! by god i think that's nearly it....except for a pencil skirt. the longish tight ones. vla, idea's of where to purchase?

i used to have one but i partied it out. yes. that is possible.

hmmm, not bad. i just made an ineb interpretation of an atkins cocktail ::
vodka, soda water, lemon, splenda and mix.

it the drink of cheese champions everywhere.

j. did you get your thing?